My day is closing, at least as Mama. I just wanted them to be in bed and sleeping so I can have my needed me-time.
Her day is not ending yet. There’s still one more video to watch, one more Play-doh tub to open, one more toy to hide. She just can’t succumb to Mama’s orders to clean, calm down, and freshen up. She’s too frustrated, she starts to annoy the baby brother. Some crying ensues. She gets reprimanded. Now, two kids are wailing. I lost the last ounce of patience for the day.
This was tonight’s dramatic-slash-chaotic bedtime scene. I am frustrated that, after 2 kids, I still don’t have enough patience. I felt guilty that she ends her day resentful and confused -and probably angry- about the wrathful woman that has become of her mom.
I decided to make amends. After giving her a tight hug in bed as my way of an apology, I showed her some baby pictures of her in my phone. That definitely got her attention. I got a few questions from the older photos. “Is that me, Mama?” And a few laughs from the wacky ones.
When I closed my phone, I was certain that both of us have forgotten about our bedtime blues.
I closed my day feeling grateful for impromptu solutions like this. Teachable moment for me. I may have a long way to go building up my patience, but I surely learned a thing tonight about how to love a child better.